I know, I last posted in March so I should really have some big juicy updates in that time, but truly, the swim suits continue to provide more drama in our lives than anything else. I mean, don't get me wrong, I had two exchanges with parents who knew C before she was C that were mirror images of each other. These two conversations provided me much to contemplate with regards to how to show real love and support versus pretending to care. But, there was no drama. Swim suits create drama. So, you know we spent ridiculous amounts of money to have a custom swim suit made for C. At least ridiculous for those of us who don't spend money on things. I'm sure, for the time and effort the very clever seamstress put in to the suit, it was very reasonable. But, when you get the very expensive suit and your child tries it on and then announces she'll never wear it in a million years, it may take every ounce of control you've got to be empathetic and kind to your dysphoric child and not just throw the damn thing in her face and tell her to figure it all out her own damn self.
C has diagnosed OCD. Like, proper spinning out of control, can't let it go, obsessions and compulsions. Her room may be a complete bomb site, but she can see the tiiiiiiiiniest scratch on her phone screen and will freak about it - unable to breathe - for days. So when the suit had the tiiiiiiiiiiniest gap between her body and the suit, y'know, so that the elastic doesn't cut off her circulation and cause gangrene or something, C lost her mind. Certain that her goolies would be on show for the entire nation, she refused to wear it. To be fair, a teenage girl with goolies has reason to be concerned in this world, but there was nothing to see. Nothin'. Compound that with the fact that the fabric bunches sliiiiiiiiiiightly between her legs so that she can actually move, it's a tragedy. "It looks like a diaper!" "It's ridiculous!" Also, it doesn't have padding up top so "It makes me look flat!" and "I don't want padding - it needs to be the real thing!" Sigh.
I asked a very kind co-worker of mine - a darling Baptist septuagenarian who has shocked the hell out of me by being one of C's greatest champions - if she'd be game for trying to modify the suit. And she said she'd give it a whirl. Y'all please keep your fingers crossed she can make this work! We're off for a beach vacation in a week and we NEED this to work! Send all the juju, prayers, good vibes. Light a candle, do the rosary - whatever it is! Pray that the gods of swim suits for trans kids looks favorably upon us!